For my revised version of my Tracing Persepolis project, I talked more about the relationship between the elements on the page; for example, the shading of the panels, the way the faces were drawn, and the way time and motion are conveyed. Instead of analyzing and looking at the tracings as a whole, I instead focused on one panel at a time. This allowed me to realize what Satrapi wanted to portray through her drawings and how each panel plays an intricate part in the page as a whole.
I also put the two tracings side-by-side in a table on my splash page in order for my readers to be able to compare them without having to continuously scroll down. In one of my subpages, I also linked back to one of Gabi’s pages where we talked about the same panel. I was able to incorporate an idea of hers into my analysis, which I feel like helped strength my discussion on the relationship between the elements on the page. Overall, I feel like my revised version allowed my readers to better understand the reason why the panels were drawn a certain way and how this impacted the overall layout of the memoir.
Over the spring break, I have revised my Tracing Persepolis project. Through discussions and suggestions from my professor David Morgen, I’ve added more in-depth analysis on what impact do the points that I have investigated have on the readers and their reading experience. In addition to this, I’ve re-arranged my formatting after reading over Dan’s project. After the revision, my arguments have become more fluent, more detailed and easier to read.
Once your Tracing Persepolis revisions are completed, publish a post on your site that links to the splash page for the project. Include one or two paragraph where you describe your revision strategy for the project. Explain what you changed and why, and how the revised version of the project is stronger than the draft that you published before spring break?
(image credit: “Traces in the Sand” by Flickr user fdecomite)
In my final product of my Tracing Persepolis project I made a few changes. I went more into depth about my claims regarding the darkness used in each of the panels I chose. I also further supported the themes that I discussed. I used Gaby’s flow of her pages to better link my pages together with hyperlinks.
I have revised my Tracing Persepolis discussion. I received helpful critiques from my professor David Morgen, and realized a valuable point of view by reading a similar discussion that Sam Balogh wrote. I also learned how to format my pictures to have them lay side by side on the page. I used all of this information in my revision of my discussion. I feel that I have increased the quality of the work overall. I will continue to revise slightly as I find places where I can improve the discussion. If anyone has any suggestions or comments post them in the comments section of this blog post or on the respective pages.
Here is a link to the Google doc that we’ll be working with in class today. We’ll agree upon a list or rubric as a community that I will apply as I grade your revised projects.
While I was working on my Persepolis Project, my main goal was to understand how Marjane Satrapi uses visual techniques to convey her message. Another goal of mine was to create a clear and coherent website, in which the viewer is able to attain all the information I had.
While completing this project I encountered two problems. This was the first english assignment that I have written that is different from the standard english essay structure that I have learned throughout high school. It was at first hard for me to decide how to organize my pages and my thoughts. I thought what I had to do was basically write an essay and separate the paragraphs into the subpages. This however would basically inhibit the viewer to exploring my website himself or herself and I felt it was important to give a sense of direction towards the reader of my project but also allow the viewer to have some sort of freedom. I decided to design my project in the way I did, so that the viewer can first understand what each page conveys, and then subsequent sub pages that analyze how Marjane sends her message. Another not as serious issue that I had while completing this process is me smudging the tracings. I’m left handed and after every couple minutes I would have to wash my hands because they got covered in lead.
To view the assignment please click Tracing Persepolis
Tracing Persepolis was a long journey, in that the majority of my time was on finding the right pages and tracing them. This part took the longest because I was torn on which panels to select. The actual synthesis did not take too long because I was constantly thinking about what the panels mean as I was tracing them. Furthermore, I believe that I better understand the time and effort that it takes to write/draw this type of book after this assignment.
My main goals for this project were to find the best two pages possible that I could manage to draw without butchering MarJane Satrapi’s work. I also wanted to find two distinctively different pages as mentioned in the assignment. I found this one of the hardest tasks in the preliminary stages. Another challenge that I had was tracing the pages. I went through about 2 mechanical pencils and 4 regular pencils until completion. I also experience a severe wrist pain for a period of time. Additionally, I found some difficulty with comparing the flow and panel arrangement between the two pages. I thought the project was interesting and very unique all together.
When we originally discussed the project in class, I underestimated how long the process would take. The most difficult part for me was putting it on the domain. I did not know how to make subpages and the hyperlink process was annoying. I really enjoyed the tracing and annotating part, even though it was tedious. In order to appeal to readers of my domain, I realized that in order for my project to flow I needed to have a theme and a metaphorical representation of the pages that I annotated. This assignment forced me to think critically and I am actually proud that I overcame challenges of the process.
I traced and annotated two pages with similar themes in order to focus on how the features of a panel can affect the tone of the pages. I metaphorically related the theme to a storm in order to make it more relatable to readers and to create a deeper meaning of the text. In my analysis, I argue that the facial expression, arrangement of panels and the shading are effective in the way they can convey a message to the reader. These features reflect the tone of the page from panel to panel. I connected my pages with lead paragraphs before my next point in order to make my project easy to digest. Although the project was frustrating at times, I am proud of myself and I am happy to share my first draft of Tracing Persepolis.
Comments are always welcome